5 Back To School Resolutions

Most people make their new year's resolutions on January 1st. But not me. My year begins in August, with the start of a new school year.

I've got a bunch of resolutions, both as a teacher and as a parent. But let's start with the parenting resolutions first:

#1: Establish good homework routines for my kids (and remember that my little one is only 8!)
Why is it so hard to give a second child the same attention that we give our first? When my son was 8, I spent lots of time helping him manage his time and organize all his materials. I checked his homework and made him redo drafts of sloppy work. I want to make sure that I do the same thing for my daughter, despite the fact that I'm feeling a little burnt out and exhausted. She still needs lots of help with organization and skills, and I need to make time for her.
Fortunately, my son, who is now starting grade 6, has developed good homework habits, so I think I will encourage him to work more independently while I focus my attention on helping my daughter.

#2: Remember how important nature and free-play are, even for older kids.
As my kids grow older, I find that the pressures around them seem to grow too. There's more homework, there are so many options for scheduled activities at school, and time seems to be so limited. However, I want to make sure that I still leave lots of time for my kids to play outside with their friends and to read for pleasure. I think that "a green-hour" (ie time in nature) is SO important for kids. So, as my kids choose their activities and plan their weeks, I'm going to encourage them to sign up for fewer activities and preserve some time to play freely outdoors and to read for pleasure.

#3: Put away my laptop and phone, and engage more directly with my kids.
Lately I've been finding myself becoming increasingly addicted to my devices. And that scares me. Last week I snapped at my daughter because she wanted to read with me, but I was too busy checking my facebook account. Now, you tell me what's more important?
So my resolution this year is to create "No Tech Zones" for myself. When I come home from work, I will have a no-tech hour, where I can engage with my children with no distractions. And similarly, from dinner till bedtime will be a "no-tech zone." We'll all focus on real human engagement -- something that's becoming increasingly endangered not just in schools but in homes.

#4: Focus on Wellness.
By the end of the last school year, I was an exhausted mess. My back constantly hurt, I was taking way too many advils for headaches, and I found myself feeling increasingly cranky. Let's face it: teaching is one of the most demanding and exhausting professions in the world. And adding parenting and book promotion to the mix, makes my life even more exhausting.
So this year, I'm going to schedule in the following:
- a morning yoga/stretching/mindfulness routine (I think I might add some brief 5 minute stretch and mindfulness breaks into my classroom routines as well.)
- Long walks or runs in the evening, when my kids are playing outside. I need a green hour just as much as they do.
- And more time for my own independent reading at nights and on weekends. Nothing relaxes and revives me like a good book!

#5: Enjoy the year!
Often, I think that I am so lucky. I love my job; I teach fantastic kids. I love being a mom and watching my own kids grow. And I enjoy all the writing and reading I do. I want to remind myself to slow down a bit and enjoy all the kids whom I work with and all the wonderful bits and pieces of my life.

Summer Freedom!

Today is the last day of this academic year. As the summer stretches out ahead of me, I feel tremendous excitement and relief.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I love my job, and I’m a big proponent of hard work, schoolwork, homework, and all kinds of work. But by the end of the academic year, I’m totally and completely worn out. Schools are possibly the most structured and disciplined places on our planet. During the school year, faculty and students alike are governed by schedules, timetables, and syllabi. We think in terms of hour-long blocks that end with a loud bell. Our thoughts are always, necessarily, fragmented. Just as we’re working through a particularly difficult piece of poetry, the bell rings. All of a sudden, students have to march to a Chemistry class and wrestle with the periodic table, while I have to run to another class and teach a totally different text. And then, all year long, students and faculty alike march from one set of assignments to another, from one set of assessments to another, from one reporting period to another. Much as I love school, I do find the degree of structure overwhelming.

So, summer is a welcome break. As I contemplate two months of freedom, I realize how important unstructured time is for all of us: faculty and students alike. While structured learning is very important, a whole different kind of learning takes place in the summer. We can spend a morning immersed in a book, with no bell to interrupt the experience. We can immerse ourselves in a particular project or learning experience without the constraints and demands of school.  We can play! Play with ideas, play with words, play in the sand and play at the beach. We can engage in an activity for the pure pleasure of it, without worrying about external assessments and judgments. We can do what we love, what we want, instead of being forced to do what everyone else (administrators, exam boards, parents, teachers) tell us to do. Oh, the joy of summer!

Unstructured time is, I think, critical for deep thinking and creativity. All people, teachers and students alike, need long stretches of unstructured time to imagine, dream, and think. It is this mental space and time that allows us to be reflective and creative. Additionally, we all need downtime to recharge our batteries. And, very importantly, we all need time outdoors, time to connect with nature and our physical environment. The beauty of the academic year is that we have this time built into every year. Every academic year begins anew in August, with renewed vigor and intensity. And then every academic year winds down in June, giving way to the luxury and freedom of summer.

Can schools vaccinate against hatred and extremist ideologies?

I recently received an email from my former professor at Harvard, Fernando Reimers, where he wrote about his feelings regarding the Orlando shootings. He said:

"I don't know about the background of the perpetrator or whether education could have vaccinated him against the sick ideas that led him on his path of hatred. I do think schools everywhere could do much more to prepare children and youth to embrace the beauty that lies in human difference, and to prepare them to challenge extremist ideologies. 

The goal to educate all was first articulated by Comenius as a way to overcome the intolerance and discrimination he had experienced. Much has been achieved in including all children in school inspired by that goal. We have work to do to ensure that teachers and schools indeed advance peace and understanding."

I couldn't agree more. As educators and as parents, we have the power to help our children understand that they must stand for peace and understanding. We can help our children to judge others less and empathize with them more, and we can help them to stand up for peace, tolerance, and diversity.

Here's an extract from a letter  I wrote to my graduating students:

"I have learned that when we skin our knees on the sidewalks of life*, we bleed, whether we’re rich or poor, gay or straight, Jew or Christian, Hindu or Muslim, Black or White, Indian or Chinese. I hope that as you venture into a world where people define themselves by how they are different from others, often with violence and hatred, you will remember our common humanity." 

*Skin our knees on the sidewalks of life is a line from Billy Collins' poem "On Turning Ten" 

3 Things I've Learned in Singapore

Here's an extract from an interview with Multicultural Kids. To read the entire interview, click here. 

How has researching and writing 'Beyond The Tiger Mom' influenced your own parenting/teaching style?

One interesting thing that all the Chinese moms I interviewed stressed was the importance of greetings; Chinese kids are expected to stop whatever they are doing at home to greet elders (parents, grandparents, visitors). The moms believe very strongly that these greetings teach kids to value and respect their elders, and that these greetings are very important for family unity and harmony. I think living in Singapore and interviewing parents here has made me think much more deeply about ways to create family unity and harmony.

Academically too, I think I’ve been very influenced by Singaporean culture. As I say in the first chapter of my book, the parents I interviewed influenced how I think about math education and the importance of early math skills.

Additionally, as a parent and an educator, I also think a lot more about how to extend my kids’ (and students’) attention spans. In the US, teachers are routinely taught to accommodate short attention spans by entertaining kids, making everything “fun,” and moving quickly from one task to the next. Here in Singapore, educators and parents don’t accommodate short attention spans; instead they deliberately train kids to extend their attention spans and concentrate more fully on a complex task for a sustained period of time.

Home Learning Cultures: What, how, and why?

Have you ever wondered about the culture you create in your home? I'm not talking about culture in terms of race, ethnicity, heritage or religion. And, I'm not talking about how loving or dysfunctional the family is (although this is, undoubtedly, the most important aspect of any family).

I'm talking about the kind of values and interests a home embodies. What does your home say about who you are and what you value? What kinds of objects are on display in your house? What do you have up on your walls? What kind of activities does your family do for fun? What do people talk about at the dinner table? What messages do the physical, verbal, and behavioral culture of your home give your child?

As Peter Drucker, the business guru says, "Culture eats strategy for breakfast," and I think that's true. The culture of the home shapes kids far more than any specific strategy, class, or task that we impose upon them.

One of my closest childhood friends lived in a home permeated by technology. His dad ran a software company, and his mom was also extremely computer savvy. They always had the latest technology and the best computers, and as a family, they preferred movies to books. My friend himself was always playing around on his computer -- not on mindless games, but on really sophisticated stuff. He started programming really young, and unsurprisingly, he went on to become a very successful software engineer. In his home, dinner table discussions would often revolve around computers, new technologies, and cars.

My own childhood home was full of literature, poetry, and art. Big, dusty bookcases crowded with books about art and architecture, museums and travel. Other bookcases overflowed with works of fiction -- great literature from India and the West. We were a reading family, and we were an artsy family.  Neither of my parents cared much about technology. They just weren't into machines. We had a small TV that was never switched on. Our house was also a quiet house. I don't remember much music or noise. Everyone in the family seemed to enjoy silence and solitude.

I often consider the kind of home that I'm creating for my children. What kind of culture are they living and breathing everyday. How can I make sure that the culture of my home reflects my love of learning, reading, and ideas?

When I talk to parents about learning, I often discuss what " a learning culture" looks and feels like at home. 

Parents can create a math culture -- with legos, tangrams, math conversations, math games, and math exercises. 

And they can create a reading culture -- with bookshelves everywhere, conversations about books, and lots of time for reading. 

And importantly, parents can ensure that everything about their homes signals to kids that learning is beautiful, enjoyable, and important.

Whose Stories Matter?

A few months after I started teaching at an international school in Singapore, I sat down at my desk with a cup of hot coffee and a pile of short stories that my ninth graders had written.

The first story was about a New Yorker named Joe who is caught in the middle of a gory murder mystery. At one point in the story, Joe runs his hands through his light brown hair in an exasperated gesture, as his blue-gray eyes twinkle. Joe is clearly White.

The second story was a tragic narrative about a young teenage girl named Sienna who is grieving over the loss of her mother. Over the course of the story, Sienna meets a young man named Steve, who offers her comfort. Early in the story, Sienna’s blonde hair flies in the wind, and later, she glances at Steve, and her soft hazel eyes meet his piercing blue ones. Clearly, Sienna and Steve are both White too.

Here’s the interesting part: both these stories were written by Asian students who had spent their entire lives in Asia. As I worked my way through the pile, I realized that all my students – my Chinese students, Korean students, Indian students, and Japanese students -- had crafted Caucasian characters in Western settings. This particular class was about 70% Asian, and many of my students had previously attended local Chinese and Indian schools. Yet every single story had a White protagonist.

I was surprised. In a decade of teaching White students in the US, I never had a single White student write a story about a non-White protagonist. In contrast, year after year in Singapore, all my Asian students write stories about White characters in Western settings. The default character, at least as teenagers see it, is a White one. And the default setting seems to be a place in America or Europe.

I joked about this with my students when I returned their stories: Who’s going to tell me a story set in Singapore with a protagonist named Mustafa or Mei-Jia? Don’t Asians fall in love, solve mysteries, and deal with conflicts? Don’t Asians have stories to tell too? Some of my students laughed; others shifted uncomfortably in their seats.

Had they, through a steady consumption of Western children’s books and Western media, internalized the belief that stories about Whites are better stories? Visit any toyshop or bookshop in India or Singapore, and you will encounter blonde haired dolls, Ladybird readers with Peter and Jane, and posters of smiling White children playing and reading.

Or, was their choice of Western characters and settings actually a function of the language that they were writing in? Would an Indian child writing in Hindi craft a story about a Caucasian named Joe who lives in New York City? If my Korean student were writing in Korean instead of English, would she have been more likely to set her story in Seoul and narrate a romance between Ji Hoon and Min Seo? Would Singaporean children writing stories in their mother tongue – Mandarin, Malay, or Tamil – create White characters in Western settings? Perhaps the issue was that the history and culture associated with the English language somehow demanded the protagonists be Western.

I am not sure whether my students’ inability to imagine Asian characters in Asian settings is a function of the language in which they are writing or of their social conditioning. Perhaps it is a blend of both. What I do know, however, is that my Asian students respond very well to books by Asian authors set in Asian contexts. And I also know, as an English teacher who scours libraries and online book shops for titles, that there are too few Asian books for children. When my students read stories by Amy Tan, they nod and laugh, as they recognize the foods, smells, tastes, and sounds that Tan describes. When they discuss the mother-daughter relationships in her books, they often say things like, “that sounds so familiar.”

I see this recognition in my own children’s reading experiences as well. When I buy picture books with Indian protagonists and Indian settings for my daughter, she scrutinizes the pictures carefully. She loves the pictures of mischievous Neil Hariharan in Anushka Sankar’s humorous book “Excuses, Excuses.” And when she first encountered Pooja Makhijani’s book, “My Mother’s Saris,” she turned to me and said, “the girl looks like me.”

Moving to Singapore jolted me into recalibrating my own storytelling. Of all the recent stories I’ve concocted for my daughter, her favorite is about a beautiful fairy named Sarita who has chocolate brown skin and long black hair that shimmers like black silk. Sarita is queen of the fairies in Fairyland, and she, together with her band of fairy friends, manages to defeat evil witches, tame terrible monsters, and save Fairyland from all sorts of awful fates. Often my daughter becomes a character in the story as she too somehow ends up in Fairyland to help Sarita in her magical quests.

Given that many Asian students, particularly in Singapore and India, live and study in English speaking contexts, maybe it’s time we provide them with English stories that are set in Asia so that they begin to see English as a global language that they can claim as their own, a global language that can tell their stories as well as it tells the stories of Joe, Sienna, and Steve.

Our children deserve a wide range of children’s literature about Asian characters in Asian countries. We need to write and publish these stories for them, both in English and in Asian languages.

My hope is that down the road when I grade my students’ stories, I will be able to read about Li Jing’s search for love as her black hair flies in the wind and Hassan’s brilliance at solving mysteries as he navigates the back lanes of Kampong Glam in Singapore.

Rigor versus Creativity: Are they mutually exclusive?

The Singapore local system prides itself for its "rigorous" program. And if you've ever looked at the exam papers for primary school kids on this island, you'll be amazed at the level of rigor. The word problems involve a tremendous amount of conceptual complexity, multiple steps, and hard calculations. The exams that these kids take are hard.

Firstly, let's clarify what we mean by rigor. It's all the rage in education circles around the world, and the East certainly prides itself in the rigor that it offers kids. Rigor, I think, refers to three things:

• The level of challenge of the problems/tasks/assessments that kids are expected to do.

• The level of precision and quality expected of kids, especially when it comes to basic skills like mathematical problem solving, critical reading, and analytical writing. 

• In order to ensure that kids can meet academic challenges and display strong academic skills, a rigorous education often requires teachers to explicitly teach concepts, assign homework, and provide detailed feedback. Rigor involves lots of practice with the goal of mastery. Rigorous education is often associated more with traditional exam-focused instruction than with constructivist project-based progressive education.

One look at Singapore's exam system for sixth graders is proof of its rigor.

But what about creativity? The major criticism leveled at the Singaporean exam system -- and perhaps any exam system -- is its lack of creativity. Exams are the antithesis of creativity because they require students to provide the answers that the examiner is looking for. There's no room for questioning or original thought or experimenting on an exam, not even on a well-designed exam. 

What does a creative system look like: it's open-ended and exploratory. Kids ask questions of their own, they design and create, they work on collaborative group projects and presentations that involve multiple disciplines and a range of skills. In an English class, kids might write poems and act out a range of interpretations of a dramatic scene; in a Science class, they ask questions and design their own experiments; in a math class, they discuss various strategies with group members to solve a math problem. The US, known for constructivism and progressive education, embraces these kinds of creative projects. 

And these projects are great -- they inspire kids, they get kids excited, they teach kids to work together and ask questions, they give kids the freedom to innovate or experiment...so what's the problem? The problem is that without a rigorous skill based education, these constructivist projects might end up being superficial and shallow. They focus more on giving a kid broad exposure and less on ensuring mastery.

If kids don't have strong skills and lots of rich content knowledge, they might end up just skimming the surface and not really learning anything deep. Without a rigorous skill-focused education, kids' reports and projects might involve sloppy writing and bad grammar; when they read, they might focus more on their feelings and less on actual literary analysis. Additionally, they will almost certainly have weak math foundations full of gaps; it's really hard to gain a strong math foundation without a systematic, sequential, and rigorous program. And as any student can tell you, group projects often mean that a few kids do all the work and learn a lot, while the other kids do very little and learn nothing. So yes, they offer creativity and inspiration, and kids certainly learn a lot from well-designed projects and explorations, but constructivism is not perfect either.

So, here's my question: why can't an education provide kids with both academic rigor and creative freedom?  Why can't we teach basic skills and core content-- critical reading, analytical writing, mathematical problem solving, core science content -- in a rigorous, more traditional way, but ALSO give kids sufficient time and space to pursue projects, engage in open-ended discussions of literature, write their own poetry, and design their own experiments? Why can't we do both? Why do educators and education systems pit rigor and creativity against each other, instead of agreeing that both have value, and that in fact, they can complement each other?

The Best Multicultural Reading List for Kids in Grades 2 to 6 - MUST READ BOOKS

Here's a list of my own kids' favorite books from all around the world. I believe SO strongly that kids need to see themselves and others reflected in literature, and this list offers kids like mine -- global South Asian kids growing up in Singapore -- a wide range of books that reflect both the familiar and the foreign in wonderful ways. 

BOOK LIST: FICTION

Charlotte’s Web (US)

-       The Folk of the Faraway Tree (England)

-       Where the Mountain Meets the Moon (China)

-       Starry River of the Skies (China)

-       The Mudskipper (Singapore)
-Sherlock Sam series (Singapore)

-       A Single Shard (Korea)

-       Noodle Pie (Vietnam/Australia)

-       Listen, Slowly (Vietnam)

-       Just A Train Ride Away (India)

     Tiger Boy (India)
Thai-riffic (Thailand, Australia)

-       Danger By Moonlight (India, Italy)

-       Flora and Ulysses (US)

-       Number the Stars (Denmark)

-       The Giver (US)

-       Esperanza Rising (Mexico, US)

-       I Lived on Butterfly Hill (Chile)

-       The Garbage King (Ethiopia)

-       Clay Marble (Cambodia)

-       The Mixed Up Files of Mrs. Basil E.Frankeweiler (US)

-       Oliver Twist (UK)

-       Red Scarf Girl (China)

-       Chinese Cinderella (China)

-       I Am David (Europe)

-       Oranges in No Man’s Land (Lebanon)
-The Ash Mistry Series (India/UK)

Tuttle News Flash: Reviews of "Beyond the Tiger Mom"

Beyond the Tiger Mom

East-West Parenting for the Global Age

by Maya Thiagarajan

ISBN: 9780804846028; $18.95 paperback; February 2016

“The best book I’ve read in years! […] When was the last time you read a book about education and parenting that really had you thinking and making changes to the way you do things in your home?  Beyond The Tiger Mom: East-West Parenting for the Global Age has had this affect on me! […] Now that I’ve read Beyond The Tiger Mom and had a little while to let the information sit in my  mind, I want to read it again.  There’s so much information I’m certain I’ll get a deeper understanding and more to think about with a second reading.  And this time I’m going to underline key phrases and take more notes.  This is one book that I’ll be keeping and referring to as the children grow.  Maya has also included many resources that I can seek out and read for more background information. […] Whether your children are in a public, private, homeschool, or other form of education, there are things that can be learned from this book.” —Castle View Academy blog

---

PREVIOUS PUBLICITY/ENDORSEMENTS:

“…one of the most fascinating books I have read in a long time.…a must read for anyone who wants to know more about education and the best way to educate a child.” —Crafty Moms Share blog

“Whether you want to train your child to expand their attention span, aid in your child reaching optimal educational success or are just looking to enrich your child in a different way of learning, this book is definitely for you.” —The Baby Spot blog

“Perhaps, while waiting for the child’s tuition class to end, mum (or dad) could read this book. You’ll chuckle over parental excesses, probably identify with most of them, devour the parenting and teaching tips at the end of each chapter, find community with parents featured, and come away reassured that your style of east-west parenting — whether you’re a Tiger parent or not — is the right way to raise your little Asian Tiger.” —SingaporeMotherhood.com

“With her knowledge and experience of what works and what doesn’t work best for children’s education, she has written this extensive, easy-to-read guide.” —Tokyo 5 blog

“’Beyond the Tiger Mom’” severed [sic] as a good reminder then to help me keep a broader perspective on child-rearing and teaching philosophy. That things I took for granted as universal parenting laws—like reading to your kid—isn’t really as universal as I thought. This doesn’t mean that I’m not going to read regularly to my child—I am, I’m a writer after all—but it reminded me that math—Kumon here we come!—and hard work are equally important keys to success…What I enjoyed most about Thiagarajan’s book was that it gave good perspective on the whole East Vs. West debate and what is really at stake…” —8Asians.com blog

“Thiagarajan’s extensive research is captured in her book to create a parenting guide that looks at the strengths and weaknesses of both Asian and Western parenting styles while dispelling the myths that often come to stereotype both…Thiagarajan offers accessible and practical advice at the end of each chapter with specific tips for Asian and Western parents to bring out the best in their children. She explores topics such as how to help children achieve their maximum academic potential, train children to expand their attention spans, find the ideal balance between work and play, view failure as a learning experience, establish tech-healthy habits, and prime children for success early on.” —BiculturalMama.com blog

“Being well-acquainted with Western and Asian approaches to parenting and education – and their stark differences – she synthesizes both in her book, bringing together the best of the East and West.” SimplyMommie.com blog

“Whether it’s talking about memorization, critical thinking skills or how to balance, here is a well-written, soundly argued book that should be of enormous interest to educators and parents alike.” —Expat Living magazine

"Beyond the Tiger Mom is a brilliant book—hard-hitting and brutally honest but also balanced, insightful, and funny. It avoids cliches and draws on years of research and personal multicultural teaching experience. It's also wonderfully practical, offering specific tips for how to combine the best of East and West." —Amy Chua, Yale Law Professor and author of Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother and The Triple Package: What Really Determines Success

"In this exquisite book, Maya Thiagarajan distills her observations about parenting as a global citizen who has lived, studied and taught in India, the United States and Singapore. An accomplished teacher and skilled writer, a reflective parent, and above all a cosmopolitan, Maya has produced a unique book that every parent trying to make sense of how best to help our children grow into global citizens should read." —Fernando M. Reimers, Ford Foundation Professor of Practice in International Education, Director of the Global Education Innovation Initiative, Harvard University

"Maya Thiagarajan brings a unique East-and-West perspective, and a refreshing balanced discussion, to hot-button issues in child rearing. Her interviews and ethnographic analyses deliver a wealth of insights into Asian vs. Western parenting decisions on topics ranging from math drills to self-esteem." —Katharine Beals, author of Raising a Left Brain Child in a Right Brain World

It's about the relationship: Kids I Love

On some days, I wonder why I became a teacher in the first place.

There's no money.
Papers keep coming in, and the marking never ends.
Where's your thesis? Work on your transitions. Why are there still comma splices in your writing?
At three o'clock, I'm utterly and totally exhausted.

What is it about this profession that keeps me coming back to the classroom, year after year?

When I first started teaching, I taught because I wanted to create a more just and equitable world.
Over the years, I taught because I loved literature, poetry and language, and I wanted to share my passion for words with others.

Most recently, however, I've realized that I teach because of the kids. One of the biggest lessons that I've learned about effective teaching is that you have to teach because you care about kids. The kids have to matter more than the texts, more than any outside goals or ideologies, more than just about anything.

 Ultimately, teaching is about forging a strong relationship with kids, meeting them where they are in the learning process, and then, to borrow Kahlil Gibran's words,  "leading them to the thresholds of their own minds."

I think good teaching is also largely about being yourself. When I think back to the teachers and professors who moved me, I remember teachers who told stories, who gave advice, who made me smile. Professor Bertolini, for example, related Shakespearean plays to his own life; when we read texts about life and death, he told us how he felt when his parents died and he was forced to confront his own mortality. The best teachers and professors were not afraid to be totally and completely human.

Teaching is a uniquely human profession, and to be a good teacher, most of all, you have to be a living, breathing, honest human with passion and feeling and energy and idealism. You have to share your experiences and questions, your ideas and even your failings. You have to be compassionate and kind. You have to be real.

And this, perhaps, is what I love most about teaching: the relationship between teacher and student. And I'm extraordinarily fortunate. Over the last few years, I have taught some of the coolest kids in the world.

 Kids who work very hard, who demand so much of themselves.
Kids who smile and laugh and say thank-you at the end of class.
Kids who see me during lunch because they want to do better on their papers.
 Kids who take a stand and argue their position with spirit and conviction.

 Kids who respond emotionally to literature -- the student who genuinely admires Atticus Finch and says he wants to be like him, the student who cried when Tom Robinson was unjustly convicted, the student who was never fully  convinced that Romeo really loved Juliet, the student who read The Kite Runner and exclaimed that he had finally found a book he loved.

 Kids who get totally engrossed in the heat and energy of a good discussion.
 Kids who stand up and share a poem with their peers, despite the knocking knees and trembling hands.
Kids who listen quietly.


So why do I teach now? I think it's because of the kids I love.

How Teens Learn: 3 Things all Parents Should Know

Spring break, unfortunately, is rapidly coming to an end. I've read a few wonderful books over break -- some great fiction, and one really interesting non-fiction book about the adolescent brain. In her book "The Teenage Brain," neuroscientist Frances Jensen offers parents and educators insights into the neuroscience of the developing adolescent brain as well as the implications of this science.

(Parents: Be warned though -- Jensen includes a number of anxiety-producing stories in the book as well, as she looks at reckless teenage behavior and the vulnerability of the teenage brain.)

Here are 3 Take-Aways from Jensen's Chapter on Learning:

1. Mastering Key Skills and Information Takes A LONG Time: Mere Exposure is Insufficient, Mastery Requires Repetition and Practice.

Jensen quotes Nobel prize winner John Eccles, "Long periods of excess use or disuse are required in order to produce detectable synaptic change." Jensen comments on this by saying, "What Eccles failed to realize is that the repetitions he observed...those 'long periods of excess use' ... were the the brain at work, learning and acquiring knowledge. After repeated stimulation, a brain cell will respond much more strongly to a stimulus than it initially did. Hence the brain circuit learns. And the more ingrained the knowledge, the easier it is to recall and use."

I've written about how learning requires sustained effort in a particular area over time, both in previous posts and in my book "Beyond The Tiger Mom."  I appreciated Jensen's detailed discussion of the science behind this phenomenon, and I think that contemporary educators need to think carefully about the science here. Too often, educators assume that merely exposing kids to interesting stuff is sufficient -- but if we really want them to master key skills and content, we need to ensure that they get sufficient practice and feedback.

2. The Teenage Years are a "Golden Age" for the Brain

 Jensen writes, "Memories are easier to make and last longer when acquired in the teen years compared with adult years."

This makes total sense intuitively: We remember the music from our teen years so well, we remember things we learned in adolescence so clearly. So what does this mean for our kids and their learning?

Jensen writes: "The teenage years are the time to identify strengths and invest in emerging talents. It's also the time when you can get the best results from remediation, special help, for learning and emotional issues."

What kids learn -- both intellectually and emotionally -- in their teenage years will have a tremendous impact on their later years, so this is a time period when we want to make sure that our kids are getting both a rigorous academic education but also, and very importantly, a thoughtful emotional education. The teenage years are a great time to get kids to think about relationships, emotional control, ethics, goodness, and truth. The values, ideas, and behaviors that they absorb at this terrific stage will impact them throughout their lives.

3. Teens need a lot of help with organization, time management, and focus -- We've got to set limits for them.

This is something that every parent and educator who works with teens knows: many of our teens need a lot of help managing their time, dealing with all the distractions that permeate the teenage world, and focusing.

Many teens, if left to their own devices (pun intended), will waste their time on social media, gaming, and a host of other unproductive activities, only to find that it's almost midnight and they haven't done any of their homework. Then they show up at school the next day, exhausted and frustrated.

So what can parents do? Jensen offers these practical suggestions:
- Remind your teen to stop and think about they need to do  and when to do it.
- Give your teen a calendar and suggest that they write down their daily schedules.  By doing so on a regular basis, they train their own brains.
- Set limits on the amount of time your teen can socialize virtually. Jensen recommends taking a hard line here: "If your teenager fails to comply, take away the phone or the iPod, or limit computer use to homework...Also insist on knowing the user names and passwords for all accounts."

Jensen writes, "The fewer the temptations for your teen, the more their brains will learn how to deal without the constant distractions."


In conclusion, Jensen's book is well worth a read. The science she describes is fascinating, and the implications are profound (though sometimes frightening).

Tuition Fever: Madness in Singapore?

During a recent conversation with a friend, we began chatting about the tutoring frenzy in Singapore, which I've written about before here.

While it's common knowledge that local Singaporean kids engage in hours of tuition, often in all their major subjects, it may come as a surprise to some that kids in international schools attend almost as much tuition as their local peers.

Divesh Shah, of the famed Math Vision Center, tutors thousands of international school kids in math and Science. Many of his pupils are young -- they start as early as grade 2. And now, apparently, there are also a host of tutors for English, History, and Economics. High school kids, apparently, are even skipping school to attend tutoring sessions... Why would any high school student require extra tuition in every subject?

I can't help but wonder at this phenomenon. I can understand tutoring in a subject or two -- when a child is really struggling. But tutoring in every subject? How is that helpful?

Here are my thoughts on the subject:

1. If parents and teachers work together in the early years to ensure that kids have strong academic foundations/skills, then kids should not need tutors when they get to middle and high school. Much of this tutoring frenzy, particularly for international school kids who move around alot, may be the result of major academic gaps in the early years.
Parents: help your kids build strong foundations in math, reading, and writing early on, and high school will be a whole lot easier.

2. Relying on tutors can be dangerous in the long run. Kids have to learn to study and work independently at some point. They've got to be able to use resources available to them on the web and in books to help them, and they've got to be proactive about seeking extra help from teachers at school. There are no private tutors in university, and there are no tutors in the workplace. So, getting kids to rely so completely on tutors may backfire down the road.

3. Calm down everyone! If kids are attending these tutoring sessions just because everyone else is doing it, and if anxiety is fueling this tutoring craze, then parents and students need to take a deep breath and calm down! By all means, kids should get customized, individualized help in subjects where they're really struggling or the school isn't delivering at all, but beyond that, they should have the confidence and courage to study and work on their own. 

Warning: The Ivy League May Be Bad For You

I just read this interesting article in the Atlantic. In the article, titled "The Ivy League, Mental Illness, and the Meaning of Life," former Yale professor William Deresiewicz asserts that the ivy league fever that grips affluent and ambitious teenagers and their parents is a recipe for misery on many levels: kids jump through hoops, turning into "sheep" with no real depth and substance; kids have inflated but fragile egos that can't survive in the real world; kids end up depressed.

Given the intense competition that I witness around me in Singapore, I do think that Deresiewicz' argument has some value. Will going to Harvard or Yale really make you a happier person in the long run? In many ways, the answer is probably no. These brand name schools will give you definite advantages when it comes to status, networks, and getting your foot in the door. But happiness...? I'm not so sure.

As parents, there is a real danger in telling a kid that he or she "must" get into a "top school." Defining success in very narrow terms is dangerous for so many reasons: it gives kids all the wrong messages. It tells them that success is conditional, love and approval are conditional, and if the kid doesn't get in to one of these "top schools," she will feel as though she has failed terribly and let her parents down.  So right from the start, this obsession with certain "brand name schools" can lead kids to depression.

As for Deresiewicz' assertion that kids become "sheep" in this process -- there is probably some truth there too. Every kid needs to hug a tree, save a poor village, and rebuild houses in a disaster area -- not because he cares about the environment or poverty or natural disasters, but because he feels as though it looks good on a resume. That's just plain wrong.

And when you've graduated from Harvard, you feel as though you've got to do something spectacular -- you've got to make a lot of money and live a certain lifestyle. And that pressure and burden doesn't necessarily lead to happiness. And it doesn't free the imagination. It is, if anything, limiting. (Not that I feel sorry for Harvard grads. I don't. They're a privileged and entitled bunch. But, a Harvard degree is not a key to happiness, by any means.)

My thoughts on the ivy league frenzy -- it's a game, and it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. As a parent and teacher, I'd rather my own kids and my students learn because they love learning and serve because they believe in the cause they're serving. I'd rather they apply to colleges that will be a good fit for them, regardless of brand names. I want them to have a broad sense of possibility and a deep love of learning. And most of all, I want them to be physically and mentally healthy and happy.

Experiential Learning: Is experience the best teacher?

We just got back from a beautiful weekend in Krabi, Thailand.



As we dove off a boat with our snorkel gear on, we found ourselves face-to-face with rainbow colored fish, their bright blue, sparkly yellow, striped black scales shining as they swam around us. Below us, spongy coral waved their tentacles; above us, hot sun and blue sky.

As we emerged from our snorkeling adventure and clambered back on the boat, my daughter whispered to me, "Ma, that was amazing. I never knew the ocean was that enchanting."

Now we've read lots of books about marine life together, and I've taken my kids to the aquarium in Singapore, but this was the real thing. They were experiencing the beauty, mystery, and wonder of the ocean firsthand.

In many ways, experience is the best teacher. For certain things -- perhaps the most important things -- experiences are what shape us,  change us, and make us who we are.

If we want our kids to understand the natural world and develop a desire to preserve and protect the environment, then we've got to let them experience nature first hand.

If we want our kids to love art and culture, then we've got to let them experience the arts and cultural traditions firsthand through travel, celebrations, cultural outings, performances, and artistic experiences.

If we want our kids to understand issues of social justice, then we've got to get them out in the field doing service, seeing how other people live, and witnessing first-hand the inequities around us.

For all of the above, experience is the best teacher. Experiences will make our kids interesting and humane; experiences will fuel our kids' desire to learn, explore, advocate, and act.

While experiential learning is fantastic, I know that experiential learning, too, has its limitations.

For basic academic skills and content, explicit instruction and book learning are crucial. Skill and drill are necessary. No child masters fractions and decimals by camping and traveling. No child fully understands the structure of an atom or cell just through interesting experiences. For kids to master academic skills and content, they need direct instruction, practice, and review.

BUT a real, true education must combine academic work with experiential learning to give kids not only the skills and knowledge they'll need, but also the desire to do wonderful and purposeful things with their lives.